29 October 2010
Test yourself. What will you add to make the sentence complete?
When we were born, our only identity was the name tag wrapped on our wrist. Then, as we grow, we began to mold our own identity. What the passport, school ID, driver's license, government IDs' can't tell about us is our real identity, the real us.
In applying for a job, we are mostly asked about how we can be an asset to the company. HR professionals keenly run through our CV in details and do background checks to see if what you wrote there are true. Why is it important for them to know us as a person and not just what letters tell them about us?
Our ID cards are so small to contain our strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes and goals and fears. Our transcript of records reflects the way we behave during school days but it's not necessarily the basis for our success. Behavior is subject to change. So as emotions, situations, dreams and priorities.
So the real us don't depend on the name of our university, certificate of achievements, not even from our parents' surname. We are responsible to our own actions. We are so unique that the purpose why we live is so different from others. Why bother if you didn't finish college? There's still time to drag that degree to your CV. There's still time to ignite the engine from rags to riches. There is still time to boost your potentials and help other people grow. Who says the clock ceased to tick? Just be confident. Your value in the society is not determined by where you've come from but what you do now and what you can do in the future!
27 October 2010
Just another day comes. Stir that hot coffee. Check those emails. Tap those feet. Aren't we expecting anything new today?
Oh, that precious smile is too rare. Well, it happens to anyone. When we are so down, feeling so weak and so vulnerable with the struggles we face, we tend to rest on the couch and hope everything will be over after few minutes. We're too lazy to face the new day because we don't know how tough this new game will be.
I have 2 words for you with 3 exclamation marks:
Few years ago, I faced a public humiliation from someone I have just met. I didn't even know who he was and why he had to pour his rage on me. My young and innocent mind was totally savaged that day. I could have been so weak and quit my work. I felt I lost my identity. After that incident, I made up my mind that I shouldn't believe his trashes. I stood up. After all, he's just one and I have many cheerers around me believing I can be better. And, writing this entry makes me realize how my life has been at its best since that experience.
No matter how big the opponents are, no matter how difficult the rules are, no matter how heavy the baggage are, we still need play a good game of life. I mean, we lose ourselves if we let the difficulties consume us. We shouldn't be called a victor if there was no battle at all and if we didn't beat the opponents- pains, problems, and sometimes ourselves.
So, just when you think of giving up, remember the two powerful words.
25 October 2010
Late Monday afternoon, I grabbed a book from my closet and flipped its leaves. Surprisingly, that encounter wasn't just in minutes but hours. Would you believe that sometimes books shout loud inside of us, specially when the topic is related to your present situation?
I'm married to my lovely wife for more than 10 months. I must admit, the 2 years of being in a relationship and a 2-month short to a year of married life is enough to say I know everything about being a husband, much more, a partner.
In the book, The Marriage You've Always Wanted, New York Times bestselling author Dr. Gary Chapman shared stories in the book that were like scenes in my self-produced movie. My degree in communications doesn't qualify me in the list of relationship veterans. I must discover and willfully admit my own faults and be honest about how I feel.
Let me share you common barriers to an open communication among couples and how to overcome it:
“They Won't Open Up”- Be honest and talk meaningfully.
“I Have Such a Temper”- Be transparent and control yourself.
“He's So Selfish”- Overcome selfishness with love.
“I Don't Want To Hurt Her”- Speak the truth with love and compliments.
“I Know That I Lack Self-Confidence”- Accept the past, face the future, embrace assurance of comfort and support from your partner.
These principles can also be used in family relations, friendship, even in school and work. Relationship doesn't just apply to married couples. It applies to all because where ever there is love, pain is inevitable. The good thing is, we can eliminate the pain and amplify love. So, the next time you have scratches with somebody you love, you already know the barriers and must do something to overcome them.
A piece of advice from the Love Veteran:
People do not “make us miserable.” We choose to be miserable.- Dr. Gary Chapman
This book is like a map to couples before they sign the contract. It is also a guide and reminder to married couples on how to make the relationship happier, stronger, and sweeter than ever. The Marriage You've Always Wanted by Gary Chapman is available at leading bookstores. For more details, ask CSM Publishing or visit their site www.csm-publishing.com.
22 October 2010
Some of us have big dreams. Many have bigger dreams. There is a song that has a line that says "to dream the impossible dream." How could dreams come true?
It starts today. It starts when we do the first move. It starts when we act on the dream. I have observed some, dreaming their dreams until their dreams sink them down beneath. I mean, dreams may be big but it all starts in small beginnings.
If you want to be a doctor, then endure the discipline of memorizing body parts and medical terminologies. If you are into sports, practice everyday. If you are in arts, like painting or interior designs, create your portfolio, do your stuffs. Invest in small things. Buy paint brushes, electronic gadgets, math books and chef knives! Don't wait till you are good enough. You'll never get there unless you start here. Watch shows that will contribute to your knowledge. Don't be caught waiting when waiting is already over.
Just like driving, if you wanna be in a place, you can't just tell your car to bring you there. Wow! That's an amazing and so expensive car. You need to heat your engine. Key in and start revolutionizing. Then move!
I take time to browse in the net for articles, presentations, videos and blogs related to my profession. I talk to people who I admire and grasp principles I need to grow professionally. These little things inspire me more to be faithful with my homework.
I have learned that there is no one else in this world who will benefit with the seeds of success we've sown but US. That doesn't make me exempted. I am also an avid learner and an aspiring guru in my chosen field. So, join the club of REVOLUTIONIZERS.
Giving is totally different from sharing. Let me explain.
Giving is sacrificing the whole pie. It's like you bought a birthday cake and gave it to your friend and sang "Happy Birthday" song. What happens next? He keeps the cake! That's already his!
Sharing is slicing your cake to give a portion to your friend. You eat the half, he eats the other. That's sharing! You are there. You tasted the cake. You just shared it to someone special to you. Got it?
When we talk about sharing, it doesn't mean we have to share what we have in hand. Those that we can't keep in our pocket are so meaningful to share.
TIME. It's so precious that we only choose people we spend time with.
LOVE. So precious that we take time to evaluate if a person is worthy of this.
ENERGY. We only have limited strength so we can only give a portion of it.
LAUGH. Medicine can't buy this. It combines happiness, joy and exuberance altogether.
FORGIVENESS. So hard to give but so liberating to feel.
PATIENCE. Not everyone has maximized it so if you have some more, please share.
FRIENDSHIP. A product of trust, love and sincerity.
Why share and not give? Because, you can't lose them. Our bodies are filled with such that all we can do is just share. Also, when you give them, it's like slicing your own pie and sharing the quarter or the half.
Think of who we can share our life.
It's nice to see people on the top of their happiness. It's more fulfilling if we are the reason they are happy today. So, from the list above, choose what to share.
15 October 2010
Would you agree with me that your taste has something to do with what you smell? And it would be difficult to identify the taste if you pin your nose? Oh, before you try that, please read the rest of this blog.
Since I was in grade school, I have been dreaming to have this nice perfume- Davidoff Cool Water. I just didn't know why I don't buy expensive perfumes even if I like them. Haha! I'm good with some perfumes I bought for myself, specially the one I bought when I got married. Anyway, this Cool Water is great and perfect for me. And only this year, after so many many years, a friend gave me a bottle of Cool Water as a gift, without any occasion! Wow!
How is it important to smell good? In my study of personal branding, the way you look determines attitude and personality, and that includes your aroma! HR professionals would think thousand times before they hire you if you stink during the job interview. On the other hand, take note, it's not just our physical aroma that matters but also our lasting aroma, which is our character.
We could always remember the sweet smell of the rose, the pleasing aroma of coffee and the luscious smell of a mouth-watery dish. Dare you, you won't be happy to smell a dead rat. You wouldn't even think of it while having your meal. Same as with people. Whenever we act strangely, naughty and undisciplined, we stink. When we pitch strong words to others, we stink. Being dishonest, disobedient and uncooperative, we stink. Our life stinks. Our personality stinks.
Life wouldn't be easy for us if we stink. Everyone will leave us without thinking twice. Take a personal inventory. Are we stinking? Do people feel good if we are with them? My nicest advice- always smell good.
In one of the local radio stations, I heard the DJ aired this line:
Brush your teeth so other people could live.
Then, smile. :)
12 October 2010
In my early 20's, I used to have a journal where I write important things to remember during the day. I pen about my lunch, my friends and my secrets. I also write about what I've learned from the people I met, could it be from the security guard, cashier, radio DJ, teller, a friend or my boss. Things are so important that I need to remember, sentimentally, who told me what.
I find it so interesting to learn from people, specially those I admire. If I can't afford to take a seminar about a certain field, I would find a person who can share experiences with me. So grateful I am that I encounter people with high calibers and share their guns on life, work, business and spiritual insights with me.
A lunch treat with my friend and boss has inspired me lately. My first question was, "what does it take to be the president, the country director, the expat, the excellent public-speaker and the friend to colleagues?" And, here he went with his stories. I was like a blank page and wrote his insights with my invisible pen in mind.
Another brilliant guy shared me his thoughts on how he has achieved his fame and credibility in the marketing industry, in just few one-on-one minutes. Very simple tip. He learned his crafts through observation. And, more importantly, he's excellent in telling stories.
My friend who owns a prestigious English school taught me on the value of networking, building relationships and helping people develop their potentials. He inspired me to become a public speaker and entrepreneur.
So, how about you? Think of who can help you build your craft. Think of what you can learn from a friend. You are fortunate if your company sends you to corporate seminars or you can afford to pay for the learning investment. If not, just be like a blank page. Find a person who you think has remarkable stories in life. Record it. Examine, evaluate and apply. And, don't forget to write your own stories too.
04 October 2010
Picture this. All of a sudden, you have thought about cooking. You searched for culinary schools and phoned one for inquiry. Then, to your surprise, the person you were talking to told you hundred reasons why cooking was too difficult for you. You are gonna waste a lot of ingredients just to learn a dish. You're gonna spend money and time to enroll in their prestigious school to become a world-renown chef. And the last thing he told you was to drop by at their place and observe how students fail in class. Would you still enroll?
Of course, there is none in the world who will tell you that. Not with that poor telemarketer. Everyone will boast on their achievements and how you would become like their previous students who are building their career around the world. Precisely. Nobody will orient you how difficult it could be for you.
There are things in life that our parents, teachers, older relatives and office superiors can teach us. But, I figured it out that most of the high impact learning experiences we had came from learning it in the hard way. That's the Hard Way Academy.
I had a talk with a respected mentor last week. To my astonishment, he unfolded a life's secret that inspired me. This well-respected didn't have a mentor! He grew up on his own and was able to build credibility in the industry for more than 20 years. I couldn't just imagine how difficult it was for him to build his confidence in the field because his creativity and intelligence is superb. He taught me to appreciate the advantages of being surrounded with successful people because their insights are like precious gems that can save me from shame.
If life will brief us on what we are gonna take, chances are, either we'll settle for less or we'll cease to live the life we wanted. If I was too scared to shift my career and beat red lights just to learn new things, I wouldn't be here writing this entry. My life has many colors- being a musician, book-lover, basketball and badminton fan, salesman, marketing professional, blogger, friend, aspiring entrepreneur, life coach, a son and a husband who loves coffee, spaghetti, pizza and doughnuts.
Everyone is entitled for a lifetime course at The Hard Way Academy. We all commit mistakes; no one is exempted. But through those failures, we learn and grow and live the life we wanted, surpassing the pain and hurt we have encountered along the way. At the end of day, we can be grateful for each Learning-from-Mistakes Semester. Without that, life could be too easy that we treat each day with no value to life.
The Hard Way Academy is open to new applicants. Who wants to enroll?